Saturday, May 28, 2011

Chasity

     In my book, I have included a chapter on chasity, which is another word for purity in the marital relationship.  There are many ways to tell if you or your spouse are loosing grip on purity in your marriage, which if left unchecked will ultimately lead to infidelity and probably divorce.  I list 27 different warning signs to look out for to determine if you or your spouse are beginning to let down your guard.  I will be focusing on these warning signs in future blogs so you can do a gut check to determine how you are doing.
      I believe that heart and mind purity is something that everyone should strive for in marriage.  While I understand that it is impossible to be perfectly pure, we can certainly do a lot to help ourselves and our marriages in this area.  It is not okay to open ourselves up to all kinds of temptations to stray away from the love of one's spouse.  Keeping ourselves loyal to our spouse in marriage takes a determined plan and consistent work over a lifetime.  It is a battle many are losing, but it is a winnable battle. 
       As a Christian, I know that we can do all things through Christ who gives us the strength.  The Lord will help us, but we must want his help and allow him to do it.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

The Covenant of Marriage

     The more that I observe marriages and the struggles couples are having, the more convinced I am that the heart of the problem is the attitude most people have when they enter into marriage.  Missing in most couples is the concept of marriage being a covenant relationship.  When a couple is married in a church or in a setting where a minister of the Gospel officiates, the ceremony is more than a legal ceremony to make the union where a man and woman can live together in an acceptable way in society.  It is a spiritual ceremony as well where commitments are made before God and man to live in the marital state until death separates then.
      While more and more couples are opting out of the marriage ceremony, or are by-passing the involvement of the church, there still is great value in taking vows made before God and man seriously.  If a couple is not committed to keeping their vows when they are spoken, then they need to rethink getting married. 
       There needs to be much greater importance put on marriage as a sacred institution than is generally done.  Pastors would do a couple much greater service if they were to stress the covenant aspect of a marriage while helping a couple prepare for marriage.  And they would do the people under their care a huge favor if they were to reinforce the covenant aspect of marriage on a regular basis in their ministries.
        The problem with marriage will continue to grow until we get back to the basics and see marriage as God sees it.  We have to stop looking through the lens of our culture and starting looking through the lens of God's Word if we are going to stem the tide of struggling marriages and divorces.
         No marriage is beyond help if a couple starts it off right and seeks help before it is too late.